Monday, April 19, 2010

#3 Give us something

"Tell your readers about what presents you'll remember forever"

I think I've mentioned it before but the most unique, heart-felt gift I've ever gotten was a baking box from my friend Liz. We were living together and baking together often. Our baking stuff was in a cardboard box which was a pain to drag in and out of the cupboard. For my birthday, Liz got a wooden drawer which had two handles on it, decoupaged the shit out of it with magazine pictures of cakes and other baked goods, a convenient new place for me to keep my baking stuff. The kicker, Liz put a strap on one of the handles so that I could carry it comfortably and level using my little arm. This girl is seriously brilliant and a seriously awesome friend.

Just before I left for Christmas holidays after my first term in school my brother offered to take me for lunch after my last exam. No biggie, pretty standard occurrence. On the way to the restaurant my brother made a wrong turn into the dealership, drove to the back parking lot and said something to the effect of "notice anything strange?". There in the parking lot was my new car sporting beautiful Manitoba license plates.

Stay tuned for installment #4 of "No one cares what I had for lunch": Exploit the youth!

Monday, April 12, 2010

You have been warned...

... this blog is going to get a bit hockey crazy over the next weeks (months?) as the NHL playoffs start.

As a Detroit Red Wings fan I will be primarily cheering for them... my secondary team is Chicago (long-time rivalry aside, they had a great season last year and are in great shape this year... and I love Johnny Toews). Beyond that I will have to choose as the games unfold.

For the first round I have made a friendly bet for the following:
Washington (4) vs. Montreal (1)
New Jersey (4) vs. Philadelphia (1)
Buffalo (2) vs. Boston (4)
Pittsburgh (4) vs. Ottawa (0)
San Jose (4) vs. Colorado (2)
Chicago (4) vs. Nashville (1)
Vancouver (2) vs. Los Angeles (4)
Phoenix (3) vs. Detroit (4)

Installment #2 of my 'No one Cares what I had for Lunch' endeavour to follow soon...

Thursday, April 08, 2010

#2 Fess Up

"How do you fail? Do you constantly kill plants? Always take the last cookie? That's the stuff friends. To err is human, but to share? Divine."

Oh dear... what do I fail at?

Well the largest failure in my life would be the most legitimate also. I failed school. Back in first year, 17-year-old me had other things on my mind and no room for school. And so, I failed. It sucked. It eventually turned into the greatest thing that could have ever happened to me but the month of August 2004 was a serious shit storm.

Enough heavy depressing failures... I fail at COMPUTERS! I can get by doing day-to-day stuff but ask me about installing programs or changing any settings on... anything and I'm pretty useless. Just ask co-worker Matt, who is the lucky soul who gets to hear all about it. I have recently learned how to google my problems and have become less of a computer failure but I still have a long way to go. The irony is that 90% of my friends are supremely computer savvy... maybe that's why I never learned, I never had to! It's your fault, friends!

And lastly I fail at dishes. I HATE doing dishes and so... I don't. Well, not totally true. I just don't do them very often. I take great measures to rinse things and stack them nicely in the sink (therefore no smell and not so messy) but I take even greater measures to avoid doing them. I am the biggest supporter of the 'I cook, you clean' mantra. On the bright side I am endlessly grateful to anyone who does my dishes for me. My friends Caitie and Liz pretty much just expect that they'll be doing dishes when they visit. It's the exchange for a clean, dry place to sleep :)

Next installment of "No One Cares What I Had for Lunch": #3 Tell your readers about the presents you'll remember forever. Coming soon!

Wednesday, April 07, 2010

New mission and a few pet peeves

I've been meaning to get this book for years now... "No One Cares What You Had for Lunch: 100 Ideas for Your Blog" by Margaret Mason. I finally sucked it up and it arrived today. After flipping through it and seeing how wonderfully creative it is I've decided to see just how far this book can take me.

So starting with Idea #1... here I go...

#1 Reign Supreme: "All of us should learn to tolerate stupid people... but what if we didn't have to? If you ruled the world, things would be better, at least in a few small ways"

If I ruled the world and standard reality still applied (I'm an engineer after all) I would appease several pet peeves. I would decree that allowing ones garbage bag to overflow so the next person has to deal with the mess be punishable by DEATH... or a smart talking-to anyway. I would decree that any spoken grammar mistake be pointed out and all corrections be appreciated as if they were enhancements to your character, exceptions shall be made for children. I would decree that brushes in nail-polish jars be constructed to reach the BOTTOM of the jar and not 1/3 down.... ladies, you know (men too if you paint your nails). I would decree that trash talk be based on FACT and not EMOTION. No more of this 'Your team sucks because it's not my team' but rather 'Your team sucks because you didn't make the playoffs' and so on.

Going slightly towards unrealistic... all arguments be solved over dinner and drinks (alcoholic or non) and killing someone is not an approved method of negotiation.

That's all I've got for now, feel free to use Ms. Mason's ideas along with me... next idea is all about failure... should be fun, stay tuned!