Monday, May 07, 2007

Attemtping (what seems to be) the impossible

6 months ago I was set to never have another co-op in Southern Ontario. With that I approached my employer and said "Yo, you gots work out West, gimme!" and with that I was on my way to Calgary.

6 months ago I had these visions of meeting cool people at work to hang out with and experience everything that Calgary had to offer. There would be road trips, hangovers, and Certified Alberta Beef! Oh yes, and it would be summer. So at the time my idea seemed flawless, what could go wrong! I'm independent, I've made it on my own before, what's the big deal?

Well I was reading Jan's blog and saw the line "since a familiar face always makes moving/new house/new job/new city a little less overwhelming." This is were I lack. I moved here just over a week ago with help from one very familiar face. It was awesome, the trip, the time we spent together blah blah blah goodness. Now that he is gone there is not one familiar face around me. The biggest thing is there is really no one I can just approach and randomly hug. Man, do I love hugs! What a feeling!

In Waterloo I have many random hugging opportunities: my roommates, no questions asked! Hug away they'll tell you! At school, pretty much any person in my class or in the halls, some even ask for them. What an environment! Heck, I could even hug the clerk at Sobey's.

I suppose if I wanted to I could get hugs here, but I would have to ask for them and they would not be familiar. They would still be great, just not quite what I'm looking for. I know exactly what it feels like to hug my mom. That is what I'm looking for. I'm looking for a feeling of familiarity.

I know, everyone around me has already told me "You are just starting, you will get used to things and make friends etc" but to be completely selfish, I want that now! I'm through with being new, I want familiarity! I don't regret my decision to come out here one bit because already I have learned so much and there are many big things coming up this term (Davela and Claire and Natasha and (hopefully!) Isanne to come visit!). I guess I'm just feeling a little lonely. And I'll say the same thing I say when I have any other bad feeling - it will pass.

Hoping all is well with everyone out there in blogger land!

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