Saturday, November 27, 2004

It's never bothered me as much as it does today

I am underage.
No, I don't have a fake id because everyone always offers me them and that they'll "for sure get me one soon" i suppose i just have to get on it myself.

In any case, I suppose it's a little lame to tell my friends "just ask me out of politeness to go to the bar with you tonight" I suppose this is to make me feel loved, i'm not sure. In any case this doesn't ever happen, maybe they don't love me...maybe they just don't think i'm that lame as to want them to ask me.

It's hard because I don't ever want my friends to stay home because I cant go to whichever bar/club/casino or whatever that they want to go to. But still, I also don't want to be left in the dust. I am in fact between a rock and a hard place for the next few weeks before I turn legal.

Today I have nothing to do and I would love to go dancing with my friends tonight. But no, I will most likely drive over to blockbuster like many other saturday's and rent some lame-ass movie that will put me to sleep and out of my boredom misery.

Friday, November 19, 2004

the past 6 monts

i have easily experienced every emotion ever created in history in these past 6 months.

in no particular order:
embarassment
fury
anger
disappointment
happiness
lonliness
sadness
heartache
stupidity (which is an emotion: i "feel" stupid)
excitment

and all of them were felt to their extreme.
its not everyday you feel an emotion for all it has to offer. like you literally FEEL the emotion, tingles and shudders and all. thats feeling an emotion.
for example, the other day i felt disappointment to its full potential. my boss told me that my memory and intelligence were "unexceptable". walking away quickly was all i could do to prevent him from seeing me cry. i made my way to the bathroom. i was disappointed in myself because i couldnt live up to his standards. this sounds so pathetic but i'm not the one reading it so shut the crap up.

in any case. thats my story. my past six months have been an absolute roller coster though it does have its extreme ups but also extreme downs. i do however feel though it is coming to the slow end before it comes to a stop in a nice hotel in alberta.

Wednesday, November 17, 2004

I've been waiting for this day since...

August 24th, 2004.

MY NEW COMPUTER IS FINALLY HERE.

I can now:
Return Lyle's, which I am so appreciative for
Transfer all my pictures that are filling up 4 email accounts
Figure out how wireless works and what I need to do/have/know to use it
(because as of today I have no clue whatsoever)
Scream on the phone to my mom because she will be equally excited.
Get ready for the dent in my credit card.

Ok I'm done.

So happy.

So So So happy.

Saturday, November 06, 2004

Hello,

I'm half watching "Lost in Translation". Only half because I just finished watching another movie and I have a problem with sitting still, I can't do it. Yet whenever I rent movies, I always get 2. This is not the purpose of this post.

What we do when we're alone and why it would freak out any regular human being if they saw it.
For example:
Only when I'm alone in an elevator do I bend my knees when it stops to help my stomach feel not so woozy.

I smile in the mirror after I brush my teeth to see if the $3.95 I spent on the new whitening toothpaste was worth it.

I consistently fix my hair even if I don't plan on seeing another human being before I wash it or go to bed or any other action that would drasticly change it.

I blow my nose like it deserves to be blown. I cannot and will not blow my nose in front of other people. I even hate it if they can hear it. I need a fully empty bathroom or area that is not within eyesight or earshot of my blowing my nose.

If anyone ever saw me fold my laundry they would go nuts. Thus I fold it while alone. I fold my underwear, yes I'm that girl. Every thing must be perfect or it gets re-folded. I think I got this from my mother.

The way I sleep strongly differs from when I'm sleeping in a room by myself compared to sharing a bed or having other people sleeping in the same room. When I'm by myself I think that I look ridiculous, I look like i fell off a moutain, except on a bed. Blankets knotted around limbs, arms hooked around pillows or headboards, toes sticking out edges. I truly look like pile of dirty laundry. When I sleep around other people, I sleep like people do in movies. Straight in one line from top of bed to bottom (compared to diagonally corner to corner) my hands are tightly wrapped around the corner of the blanket and I look like a corpse that has been so effortlessly placed on my bed. This is sad, why do I care so much about the way I look when I sleep?

And last but not least I sing.
Belt it out. No one ever hears me sing like the way I do when I'm alone and no one can hear me. My car, in my room, in the shower. I sing. And I suck nonethless. But as Lisa Simpson asked us: If a tree falls in the woods and there's no one around to hear it, does it make a sound? Well, if I'm the only one around to hear myself, do I really sound that awful? You be the judge.

Now that I've missed 20 minutes of this movie and thus cannot give a legimimate review to my mother, I must go.

Enjoy your day,

Erica


Thursday, November 04, 2004

The Day to End All Days

I have been moved at work.
I would not say to a better location but to a more interesting one nonetheless.
I'm currently monitoring the structural steel erection, it's a good time because I get to use the word "Erection" properly and sound smart. Who would have thought?

In any case I suppose that it is pretty interesting. Though it has shown me that I never want to do structural stuff.

Oh ya and the best part is that my boss makes me cry on a daily basis.

My life rules.

Though on the plus side I'm going Christmas shopping this weekend which I just love doing. Though I should check my account balance first. Yikes, maybe I'll just go home-made this year. Naw, if there's anything that I enjoy spending money on it's gifts. Hah, I wrap gifts and then make my friends open them right away. Hey IDEA, I'm not going to buy wrapping paper this year. SAVE MONEY. Go team Erica!


Ok ok, I realize this is so dull but whatever, I'm not writing it for YOUR entertainment. I'm writing it because as long as I sign into Blogger fairly often and the internet stays around for as long as I think/hope it will, this journal will last awhile and thus is purely for my own enjoyment.

much love.